You Do You For YOU!
Too fat. Too thin. Too muscly. Not enough muscle. "She looks like a dude." "She has NO business wearing those shorts." "She looks anorexic." "She feeds her kids garbage." "She's just trying to get attention." "She looks like she gave up on life." I’ve heard women say all of these things and more.
How many more comments could we add to the never ending things that women say about each other? It's absolutely heartbreaking to hear the judgment that we place on other women when we could be coming together to inspire, uplift, and refresh each other.
We cover our arms because they're not as tight as society thinks they should be. We cover our thighs because of cellulite and stretch marks. We won't leave the house without makeup because we are "scary" without it. We have to get tans, we have to dye our hair, we have to...because...
We need to take a step back and ask “Why am I doing the things I’m doing? Do I feel shame? Do I feel guilt? Are there scars from my past?” If so, can we learn to work through past pains and rediscover a better “why”?
What is the "why" behind what we do? Do we love how powerful we feel with a good red lipstick? Do we love that festive, summery feeling that comes with a good tan? Or do we feel like we have to apply tanner before going out so other people don't see our white legs? If we leave the house without makeup, do we feel like other people will think we don't take care of ourselves? What if the stretch marks on our thighs show? Will people think we're gross and unnatural?
I wear some type of makeup probably 75% of the time. I wear it because I love the way my brows looks when I define them. I love the way my lashes look when I wear thick, black mascara. I feel extra dressed up and elegant when I apply a dark, smoky eye. And when I don't wear it, my face feels free and liberated, and every bit as beautiful. I use a self tanner (Fake Bake- it’s awesome!) in the summer because I love the glow it gives my skin, and the way that it makes my muscles "pop". I let my stretch marks show because I literally do not care that I have them - they show that I'm living life 😀
Some of this has been a real journey and practice for me. When I started developing acne at the age of nineteen, I was mortified for years to even consider letting people see me without makeup. I felt like a slave to my concealer and foundation. Andy saw my WHY and encouraged me to try going without makeup for a week. I did it, and finally realized that I had a very unhealthy mindset concerning makeup. I ended up going the rest of that summer wearing no makeup except mascara and eyebrow pencil. When I started wearing some again, I started wearing it because I WANTED to. Not because I felt like I "had" to. I did not feel embarrassed without it. I did not feel like I was not taking care of myself without it.
I have a lot of scarring from the acne, and still break out two thirds of every month. But I am free from makeup now. I can wear it or not. I love makeup and have so much fun with it sometimes! I love being able to honestly answer my kids question "Why do you wear makeup, mommy?" Not with "Because I would scare all the little children if I didn't wear it." But with "Makeup is super fun! I love the way I can paint my face in different ways, and how dressed up I feel when I wear a full face of makeup!" Through this, I'm teaching my kids that they are beautiful and enough, and they can still have fun painting this or dying that.
You are in charge of the way you look. Not society. Not past relationships. You want to wear makeup 24/7? Go for it! You want to show those gorgeous, porcelain legs? Yes, girl! You want to dye those gray streaks? Alright! You want to rock a full head of beautiful white hair? Do it! Just make sure that whatever you do, it's because YOU love it.